ALL RIGHT ALL RIGHT ALL RIGHT

[hewantstheb]

IMMA POST THIS MEME OKAY? OKAY.

They saw you die. They attended your funeral, put flowers on your grave. They were absolutely certain that you were dead. Only suddenly, here you are.

Now what do you do?

Situations:

1. Took Longer That I Thought: Maybe you got lost or stranded on a dessert island, or kidnapped by pirates. But whatever the case, you’re back now! Only everyone’s acting like you’re a ghost...


2. Amnesia: You took a blow to the head and lost your identity. Now, you remember, and are going back to your old life. Of course, others have moved on with their lives.


3. Sleeping Beauty: It might have been magic or the best of modern technology, but you were put into a deep sleep until some future time. Unfortunately, not many people were in on this plan.


4. Only Mostly Dead: Maybe you got bitten by a giant spider, or maybe you were apparently killed on a hostile planet. Either way, they had to leave your ‘body’ behind. Except you weren’t as dead as they thought.


5. Faked It: For whatever reason, you faked your own death. Have fun explaining that to your loved ones.


6. Back From the Dead: It might be a deity or super-advanced aliens, but something or someone resurrected you. What was being dead like?


7. Mix and match or make up your own!

FOUND ON bakerstreet BUT I THOUGHT WE COULD DO THIS HERE INSTEAD.

THAT'S IT. THAT'S ALL YOU GET. I'M OUTTA HERE.

Comments

Do it with a big ol' smiiiiile?

[shewantsthej]

[--Which was precisely the thing not to say.

The much tinier figure sashayed forward, curve hips swinging as that giant mallet was trailing behind the woman as she approached the clown. It seemed almost impossible the way the woman could wield that thing with one hand so deftly, but that loving gift of sweet toxins from Ivy had certainly given Harley quite the upgrade in strength and dexterity.]

Pretty good? [Her voice hitching up into an annoying, shrill yell with each step advancing step towards The Joker, lithe body hunching forward as if she was a cat on the prowl, free hand curled into a tiny black fist--] Pretty good?! Two months gone and that's all ya have t' say t' me?!

[Oh dear, out came that mallet again, the woman expertly using her entire body to swing the oversized weapon at the man, missing his chest (purposely?) by a few--very short--inches.] I'll show you a good disappearin' act, Joker! C'mere an' see th' surprise I've been keepin' just for you.

Uh-huuuuuuh

[hewantstheb]

[Intentional miss or not, the Joker scrambled back. "Chest cavity accidentally crushed by enraged girlfriend's cartoonishly large hammer" was definitely not on the list of ways he wanted to go, even if it would be a little funny. He wouldn't be around to enjoy it, for one. For two, come on. If he was really going to bite it, it'd be flashy. Go big or go home.

He held up a hand, ostensibly calling for peace, while the buzzer was palmed and his armed hand was kept behind his back.

Of course, in this case he had other weapons at his disposal, like a big, winsome smile and a saccharine tone.]

Now, I can see you're upset, but it hurt me too, you know! If I could have taken you with me, I would have! Really! But it had to look real, you understand, don't you Pumpkin Pie?

[shewantsthej]

[There was a momentary pause, the giant mallet held aloft in the petite woman's hands as if she was prepared to knock the clown's head off of his broad shoulders, Harley's blue eyes narrowing darkly at him, black-lipped frown twisting even deeper.

But, unsurprisingly to all the readers at home, the harlequin couldn't resist her psychopathic boyfriend's oozing charm, so the mallet went flying carelessly behind her, no doubt 'accidentally' colliding with some unfortunate goon's head, as Harley was dashing forward to toss herself at Joker, arms and legs wrapping around him, head snuggling up affectionately just under his chin, like a very strange, oversized, and oddly clingy cat.]

Okay okay! Ya always know just what t' say, Mistah J! I forgive ya! [Like he cared.]

[hewantstheb]

[There went another henchman. Oh, well. Dime a dozen, mustn't cry over spilt milk, etc., etc., and so forth.

Ugh. He suppressed a long-suffering sigh and patted Harley's cowled head, slipping the buzzer back into his pocket while she was distracted. No need for that. Using it would've been mildly regrettable, anyway--not that he'd missed his number one hench girl or anything. Perish the thought.]

That's all I ask, Poo--

[Like so many things, he found himself putting up with her affection with grace and good humor--aka attempting to free himself with a well-placed push and shoving an oversized gun into her hands to keep her occupied. What could he say, he just wasn't really the cuddling type.]

--Now, be a dear and hold that to someone's head, would you? Daddy has work to do.

[Like murdering each and every person that witnessed their little lover's quarrel, for starters.]

[shewantsthej]

[Though Harley was just a little firmly set in her gripping embrace and the pair of black-painted lips that were puckering up in the clown's direction, all it took was a little gentle persuasion and the feel of a heavy gun in her gloved palm to push the curvy woman off of The Joker and back into action. No, she may not have been the smartest or the most effective henchwoman, but at least she could do a few things right. And that loyalty to him was pretty damn near unbreakable.]

Shore thing, Puddin'! [And with a grace of a Olympian-level gymnast, Harley was flipping and bouncing and cartwheeling to whatever poor sucker was going to feel the press of a cold barrel to their head, the former-psychiatrist blowing her darling a cheesy kiss from far away. Go and make mama proud, honey!]